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I recommend sitting up with your back against the wall or headboard, with your legs outstretched or slightly bent. Have her lie between your legs, on her back, with her feet close to the wall or headboard.

You can easily swap between hands, if one arm starts to get a little fatigued. You can also stay in this position for a long time.

Before you even venture near her vulva, spend plenty of time teasing her and getting her excited for more contact.

So many people men especially underestimate the lead-up, but many women say that the teasing is their favorite part of being fingered. Spend tons of time kissing her and playing with the rest of her body.

Grind your body against her crotch. Take her pants off, but leave her underwear on. Run your palm up and down her labia. When you take her underwear off, continue using your entire hand to stroke against her labia, without parting them.

Finally, part her labia with one fingertip, and continue that back and forth motion. Lube prevents any uncomfortable pulling or tugging of the skin, and also amplifies the sensation.

I think silicone-based lubricant feels best against the skin, especially for fingering. I highly recommend investing in a nice bottle to keep in your bedside table.

Most women love clitoral stimulation, and need it to reach orgasm. Start off by slowly circling her clitoris, without directly touching it.

Make your circles tighter and tighter, until you start grazing against the clitoris. If she pulls away or tells you to be softer, stick with the indirect stimulation.

If she likes the more direct stimulation, you can continue the circular motion directly over her clitoris. Or try stroking a finger diagonally across her clitoris.

Although clitoral stimulation is typically what feels best for women, you still want to get other parts of her body involves. Play with her breasts, thighs and hips.

You can also take breaks away from her clitoris to tease her. Try dipping one or two fingers into her vagina.

This gives her time to relax into the experience. She can still enjoy herself and feel a ton of pleasure without having an orgasm. You tell me whenever you want me to stop.

I hope this article is a helpful introduction to fingering, but keep in mind that getting feedback from the human being in front of you is far more important than memorizing my instructions.

There are two ways to get feedback - verbal and non-verbal. I think verbal is best, but I also know it can be challenging for a lot of people.

Instead, try two different techniques. If you're about to go through a large crowd, hold out your hand so you can walk through the crowd without losing each other.

This not only shows that you care about her, but it also shows that you can take the lead. Once you're out of the crowd, you can continue holding her hand if she seems interested.

Holding hands is a big step for a lot of girls. If she's not into that right away, don't be too discouraged. She might be waiting to be your girlfriend before you really hold hands, especially in public.

Part 3 of Brush something off of her face or hair. It's not uncommon to see a loose eyelash on someone's face. If you see one, tell her, "Hold still.

You have an eyelash on your face. Let me get it off. Don't apply too much pressure, especially if she's wearing make-up. Do the same thing if you see something in her hair like a piece of lint or a ball of dust.

Obviously, don't stare at her face all night until you finally see an eyelash there. But if you do see one, great.

You can also lie. Say that she has something in her hair, even if she doesn't actually have anything there, and break the touch barrier this way.

Don't brush any food off her face. Saying "Wait, you have a little chunk of bacon on your chin" is just not hot.

Compliment her jewelry or nail polish. Does she have a different ring, a new haircut or a different nail color? Acknowledge it verbally "That's a pretty ring" or "Did you get a new nail color?

Hold out your hand, palm up, and ask if you can look closer. Inspect whatever is different, and ask a question or make a positive comment.

If she has a nice earring, hold it up in your hand and say how pretty it is. But you should only try this move if you've already touched her -- reaching for the face is pretty intimate.

While you're doing all of this, get a feel for how she responds to having her hand in yours. After she has responded to your comment or question, briefly rub her hand with your thumb gently and let it go.

Smile and quickly move on, but be careful not to appear creepy. Keep her warm. If it's chilly outside and you notice that she's cold or shivering, offer her your coat.

Put it around her. Depending on how comfortable she feels around you, you might take your hands and brush them briskly on her upper arms to generate a little heat.

If you notice that her hands are cold, tell her to give you her hands and put them together palm to palm.

Put your hands around hers and rub them softly, but quickly to warm her hands up. If you're feeling daring, bring her hands up to your mouth and blow a little warm air on them.

However, make sure your breath doesn't stink. Be playful. If you're teasing each other, it's okay to give each other gentle shoves, pats on the arm, or playful touches on the shoulder.

If you're flirting with each other, then it's natural for you to touch each other, as long as you're both doing the touching.

She may even end up touching you more than you touch her. If you're both in a fun-loving and flirtatious mood, then it's okay to touch her this way.

Being playful is perfect if you're both doing it. But if you notice that you're the one touching her and she doesn't reciprocate, back off. Make a bolder move.

If she responded positively to all of the above, make your next move or risk forever being trapped in the friend zone. That could be putting your arm around her shoulder or waist, or holding her hand.

The back of the neck and the small of the back are two sensitive areas too. Notice when she's not interested. If she isn't responding positively to these actions, simply back away.

It doesn't necessarily mean she's not interested. She could just be in a bad mood or feeling tired. However, if you've tried this more than once and get the same response, she likely isn't interested in being touched by you.

Part 4 of Any kind of partner dancing, such as salsa , tango or swing can be a good way to break the touch barrier. Keep in mind, however, that just because she seems to be having a good time dancing with you doesn't necessarily mean she likes you off the dance floor.

It's certainly a start though. Go ice skating. Ice skating is a great activity for casual physical contact. You can hold her hand to help keep her from falling if she isn't quite getting the hang of it, or to help each other skate backwards.

In the cold environment, you may also have the opportunity to help her keep warm with a hug or encircling her with your jacket. Play tennis.

Have her as your doubles partner. There will be plenty of opportunities to high-five and playfully touch her after a good shot.

At the end, you can also touch her back or shoulders and say it was a great game. Just remember that she'll be conscious of sweating a little bit and may not want to be touched so much during or after the game.

Try any activity where the equipment requires you to hold her from behind. For example, riding tandem on a motorcycle, sitting on an inner tube or sled going down a snow hill, parachute jumping in tandem, etc.

Go mini-golfing together if you know how to hold a golf club. There are plenty of sporting opportunities for this closeness to be imposed on both of you!

Part 5 of Don't give an unwanted massage. Don't approach a girl and give her a shoulder massage for no reason. If she tells you she's sore, rubs her own shoulders, or even asks for a massage, then that's one thing.

But if you just come up to her in the middle of the day or try to give her a massage the second you're alone together, that will quickly send the wrong message.

If she tenses up instead of relaxing as soon as you give her a massage, then you've already gone too far. Don't grab her.

Avoid grabbing any part of her arm with your hand and pulling her to come somewhere with you. At best, this can be interpreted as annoying. At worst, it can come off as an attempt to yank her around.

Generally, any kind of pulling or tugging might be interpreted as immature or pushy. There's a difference between playfully pulling each other in the direction you want to go and actually grabbing the girl in a way that feels violent and inappropriate.

She might enjoy gentle caresses on her face and neck, or she might enjoy back rubs or having your arms around her waist. Experiment with different touches and ask what she likes or dislikes.

Not Helpful 13 Helpful Not Helpful 12 Helpful Not Helpful 5 Helpful A girl who I think has liked me for a few years often finds excuses to touch me.

For instance, I got a notification, and she walked up and leaned on me with her head on my shoulder, then asked about it. It sounds like she likes you, unless you see her constantly doing things like this with absolutely everyone.

If you like her, you should just tell her. If you're too shy, or you're still unsure how she feels, start touching her back respectfully and see if she escalates the flirting.

Just do something small, like touching her arm or hand when she's talking to you. Not Helpful 26 Helpful It depends on the person and the situation.

It might just be a playful, friendly touch, or it might be something more intimate. Do not do that. If she isn't interested, move on.

Don't make any more advances. And, by all means, don't force it. At best, you will make things awkward, and at worst, the consequences could be dire for you.

Not Helpful 45 Helpful She probably likes you. This is a great way to break the touch barrier. If you want to try to take it to the next level, try holding her hand and see how she reacts.

Not Helpful 14 Helpful My boyfriend is very outgoing with me. He has quit his guy group to be with me and hugs me a lot, but he makes no effort to hold my hand.

I would like him to. What should I do? If he is very outgoing, you could quietly ask him to hold your hand. If he is casual about hugging you, then the touch barrier has already been broken, so it shouldn't be hard for him to hold your hand.

Not Helpful 27 Helpful Not Helpful 18 Helpful This boy won't stop touching me and is always grabbing my arm. What should I say?

Tell him that you're uncomfortable with him touching you, and ask him directly to stop doing it. If he doesn't stop, tell a teacher, parent, or any other nearby authority figure.

No one has the right to touch you without your permission. Not Helpful 35 Helpful Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.

Always try to have clean, dry hands. If she gets a whiff of the onions you were cutting a few hours earlier , that's not good. If you tend to get clammy hands, carry a dry paper towel in your pocket and use it right before you touch her.

Avoid having cold hands, because this will startle her. If this has happened, address the situation with a joke, because this can help break the ice.

Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0. Cracking a joke that's just inappropriate enough to make her slap you on the arm, but appropriate enough to make her laugh at the same time will trick her into touching you.

However, these kinds of remarks are high-risk and can get you in hot water among people who are sensitive.

Try this at your own risk. Helpful 1 Not Helpful 1. Look at a girl's body language. It says a lot about her. When you are talking, look at her feet.

If they point towards you, she's interested in the conversation, at least. If she plays with her fingers or hair around you, she's nervous.

Sometimes, the best bet is even to ask a good friend of hers if she likes you first. Usually a girl tells her BFF everything about this stuff. Make sure she wants to be touched.

Helpful 4 Not Helpful 0. If you know how to ice skate, bring the girl to go ice skating. If she doesn't know how to, then say "I'll teach you there.

Helpful 3 Not Helpful 0. Always remember, if she's not interested in being touched by you, it doesn't necessarily mean she doesn't like you.

Take a small step back and be careful not to make any big moves, but keep your hopes up. Personal space is also important.

She may be uncomfortable with you touching her just because you may not be close, so don't ever just walk up to a stranger and tap their back when they are being casual.

Helpful 2 Not Helpful 0.

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